New Leaders: Why Building Relationships with Your Team Matters

/ Jonathan Sachs

It can be challenging for new leaders to balance between being respected and approachable. However, building a relationship with your team members is crucial for their development and your success as a leader. In fact, bosses who develop relationships with their team members also help those team members to develop their own resiliency.

Relationships Create Psychological Safety

One of the most significant benefits of building a relationship with your team is the creation of a sense of psychological safety. Psychological safety is the belief that one can take risks and be vulnerable in front of others without fear of negative consequences. This creates an environment where team members feel free to try new ways of doing things, delight their customers, and share ideas without fear of retribution. Team members who feel safe are more likely to be engaged, and their engagement often translates into better performance.

A strong relationship with a boss is at the root of feeling secure and safe. When team members feel that their boss values them as individuals, they are more likely to be committed to their work and to the team’s goals. As a result, they are more likely to take ownership of their work and produce higher quality results.

According to a study in the International Journal of Industrial, Occupational and Organizational Psychology and Behavior, Authors Abraham Carmeli and Jody Hoffer Gittell found that leaders who develop high-quality relationships with team members can create a culture of psychological safety. These relationships were developed by providing support, empathy, and trust to the individuals, and such relationships can lead to increased learning from previous failures, therefore improving performance.

new leaders should build teams with psychological safety to enhance performance and impact

Examples From Business: Google and Southwest Airlines

To further illustrate this point, let’s examine a couple of examples from the business world. First, let’s consider Google, a company that consistently ranks as a “best places to work.” Google has long been known for its emphasis on employee relationships and psychological safety. By providing a culture where employees feel psychologically safe and supported, Google creates an environment that fosters creativity and innovation.

Another example is Southwest Airlines, which despite some recent setbacks, is consistently ranked as one of the best-performing airlines in the United States. Southwest’s employees are known for their positive attitude and excellent customer service – allowing their unique personalities to shine through without punishment or reprisal. Southwest places a significant emphasis on employee development, which includes how to create exceptional relationships among team members and leaders. By valuing their employees and creating a culture of empowerment, Southwest’s employees are motivated to provide exceptional customer service.

Example From the World of Sports: Coach Phil Jackson

Phil Jackson is known as a leader who developed strong relationships with his team members, which he did as the former head coach of the Chicago Bulls and the Los Angeles Lakers of the National Basketball Association (NBA).

During his tenure with both teams, Jackson was known for building strong relationships with his players and became known by the nickname “Zen Master”. He emphasized open communication, harmony, mutual respect, and trust as the foundation of his coaching style. He believed that by developing relationships, he could create a culture where players felt comfortable taking risks and trying new things on the court. This relationship-based approach paid off in a big way for Jackson and his teams.

Phil Jackson – Michael Jordan

Phil Jackson led the Chicago Bulls to six NBA championships in the 1990s, and the Los Angeles Lakers to five championships in the 2000s. Many of his players, including Michael Jordan, Kobe Bryant, and Shaquille O’Neal, credit Coach Jackson with helping them develop their skills, both on and off the court.

For example, during the 1997-1998 season, Jordan was dealing with personal issues and had lost his father earlier in the year. Jackson knew that Jordan was struggling and took the time to offer his support. Jordan later said that this conversation helped him get through one of the toughest times in his life. Jordan shared that he felt that Jackson genuinely cared about him as a person, not just as a player.

Phil Jackson’s style was on full display in the documentary, “The Last Dance” when discussing his final season coaching the Chicago Bulls. Knowing that he was going to be terminated at the end of the season and the team would be broken up, he used that to further strengthen the bond among the players. He became even more trusted, especially managing the strong personalities on the team, including Michael Jordan, Scotty Pippen, and Dennis Rodman.

Phil Jackson – Kobe Bryant

Similarly, when Kobe Bryant was a young player with the Lakers, he had a reputation for being both difficult to coach and a selfish player. Coach Jackson took the time to build a relationship with Bryant, getting to know him on a personal level and helping him develop his leadership skills. Bryant later said that he felt that his relationship with Jackson was more than just a coach–he was a mentor and a friend.

These examples show how a leader who takes the time to build relationships with their team can help those team members develop their resiliency, a key characteristic of effective teams. By creating a culture of psychological safety, team members are more likely to take risks, try new things, and perform at their best without fear. As a new leader, taking the time to build these relationships can be one of the most effective ways to build trust, laying the foundation for a strong and successful team.

A Lesson for New Leaders

As a new leader, it’s essential to prioritize building individual relationships with your team members. By creating a culture of psychological safety, you’ll foster an environment where team members can take risks, try new things, and produce their best work. As demonstrated by Google, Southwest Airlines, and Phil Jackson, developing strong relationships with team members can have a significant, positive impact on driving for results. As you start your leadership journey, remember that your team’s success is your success, and investing in your team is always a wise choice.

Key Takeaways

New leaders who develop strong relationships with their team members can help those team members develop resiliency, which can lead to increased performance and success. Building a relationship with a boss creates psychological safety and a feeling of security, allowing team members to take risks, try new things, and delight customers.

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Creating a Culture of Trust and Cooperation: Lessons from ‘Leaders Eat Last’ by Simon Sinek for New Leaders

/ Jonathan Sachs

Becoming an effective leader requires more than just holding a position of authority. To lead a team effectively, leaders need to inspire and motivate their team members to achieve common goals. One of the most insightful books on leadership is “Leaders Eat Last” by Simon Sinek. In this book, Sinek shares strategies and principles that can help anyone become a better leader.

Why I refer this book to all new leaders I meet

Sinek’s most popular book, Start with Why, which accompanied one of the most viewed TED Talks of all time, is an essential read. I have even reviewed it on this blog! Start with Why contains extremely important information on how excellent leaders communicate, and Leaders Eat Last builds upon those concepts discussing the essence of what it means to be a servant leader. To a servant leader, being in leadership is not about a title, control, prestige, or advancement. It’s fundamentally about service, calling, and mission.

Sinek discusses lessons from government and businesses about servant leadership. He also discusses generational differences in the workplace, which I believe is an under-appreciated topic.

Summary of Leaders Eat Last

The book’s title comes from a practice in the U.S. Marine Corps where leaders prioritize the needs of their team over their own. This simple concept is the foundation of the book. Sinek argues that true leaders prioritize the well-being of their team members, which creates a culture of trust and cooperation.

Simon Sinek's book "Leaders Eat Last" takes lessons from the Navy Seals and US Marine Corps on what it means to be a servant leader. The book is an essential read for new leaders.
CORONADO, Calif. (Jan. 23, 2018) U.S. Navy SEAL candidates participate in Basic Underwater Demolition/SEAL (BUD/S) training. SEALs are the maritime component of U.S. Special Forces and are trained to conduct a variety of operations from the sea, air and land. (U.S. Navy photo by Mass Communication Specialist 1st Class Abe McNatt/Released)

Sinek emphasizes the importance of creating a sense of belonging and purpose in a team. He gives the example of a company called Barry-Wehmiller, where CEO Bob Chapman created a culture of care and respect for his employees. By deliberately building trust, Chapman created a sense of purpose that motivated his employees to work harder and achieve more. This example illustrates that to get results as a modern leader, it is imperative to create an environment where people feel valued and inspired.

As I mentioned earlier in this post, the book also discusses the concept of “servant leadership.” Sinek explains that servant leaders prioritize the needs of their team members, rather than their own interests. He says, “True leaders are not those who strive to be first, but those who are first to strive and who give their all for the success of the team.” By serving their team, leaders create a culture of trust and respect that empowers team members to take ownership of their work. When employees take ownership and responsibility over the work, quality tends to increase because they feel like the work reflects on them personally. That type of pride can help teams achieve tremendous results. Building an environment where people are empowered and feel ownership creates incredible results, particularly in customer service and experience.

Lessons Learned

In conclusion, “Leaders Eat Last” is an essential read for anyone looking to become a better leader, especially those who are new to leadership. By prioritizing the well-being of their team members, creating a sense of purpose and belonging, and practicing servant leadership, leaders can inspire their team members to work harder and achieve more. As Sinek says, “Leadership is not about being in charge. It’s about taking care of those in your charge.” By following the principles outlined in this book, anyone can become an effective and respected leader.

Fundamentally, “Leaders Eat Last” discusses what it takes to succeed as a modern leader. By showing those on your team that supporting them is more important than hierarchy or command-and-control, it will help leaders accomplish broader and more complex goals.

Key Takeaway

“Leaders Eat Last” by Simon Sinek shares key messages about effective leadership, including prioritizing the well-being of team members, creating a sense of purpose and belonging, and practicing servant leadership. By following these principles, new leaders can become an effective and respected.

Leaders Eat Last  is available for purchase on Amazon

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Learning from Ted Lasso Can Make You a Better Leader

/ Jonathan Sachs

After not posting for a while, I’m back! Lots of major life changes at once will slow down any blogger, but I am excited to be writing again. I have been saving drafts of posts for a while now, so expect a lot of content on leadership, innovation, and how we treat each other coming your way.

Ted Lasso is also back and I am ready to “Believe” along with the characters on the show.

In a world where leaders are often characterized by their cutthroat nature and insatiable thirst for power, it’s refreshing to see a character like Ted Lasso. Coach Lasso teaches us that leadership is not about being the most dominant or feared figure, but rather about being vulnerable, empathetic, and understanding. There is a lot to learn from Ted Lasso about being an effective leader. I have tried to adapt some of his messages and apply these leadership methods and philosophies to my own life.

If you have not completed season 2 of the show, I would encourage you to go to another part of this site, like perhaps this reading list, watch the show and then come back. In other words, this is your SPOILER ALERT:

Here’s a few things we can learn about leadership from the show so far:

The Role of Vulnerability in Ted Lasso’s Leadership Style

One of the defining features of Ted Lasso’s leadership style is his willingness to be vulnerable. From the very first episode of the show, we see that Ted is not afraid to show his emotions and share his personal struggles with his team. In one scene, when asked how he’s doing, Ted responds, “I’m doing great, but I’m also a little overwhelmed, and I’m scared, but I’m excited, too. It’s a weird feeling.”

Lead like Ted Lasso on and off the pitch

By sharing his own vulnerability, Ted creates a safe space for his team to do the same. He encourages his players to open up and share their own struggles, creating a culture of trust and mutual support. This vulnerability not only strengthens the bond between Ted and his team, but it also creates a more compassionate and empathetic workplace.

In season 2, Ted finds his way back to vulnerability when he reveals that he had a panic attack during one of AFC Richmond’s games. He admits to the team that he wasn’t completely honest and apologizes. Ted says, “Y’all found out about something
from somewhere, when you should’ve found out about it from me first. But I chose not to tell y’all, and that was dumb…Now, I hope y’all can forgive me for what I’ve done. ‘Cause I sure as heck wouldn’t want any of y’all to hold anything back with me.”

By admitting the mistake he made in not being honest, Ted is being vulnerable by asking for forgiveness. This action only strengthens his bond with his players.

The Use of Colloquialisms and Its Positive Impact

Another important aspect of Ted Lasso’s leadership style is his use of colloquialisms. Ted often uses folksy sayings and expressions that may seem out of place in a professional setting, but they serve a purpose. Ted’s colloquialisms create a shared language that unites his team and helps them feel like they’re all in this together. When Ted tells his team, “be a goldfish,” he’s reminding them to let go of mistakes and move forward. When he says, “it’s the hope that kills you,” he’s preparing them for the possibility of failure while encouraging them to keep trying.

These colloquialisms not only create a shared language but also help his team to stay motivated and focused. By providing a clear and memorable message, his team can quickly recall and apply those lessons, in both their professional and personal lives. The colloquialisms also serve as “Inside jokes” that only the team shares, creating small shared experiences and strengthening the team’s bond.

Ted Lasso’s Relationship with Coach Beard

Perhaps the most important factor that makes Ted Lasso an effective leader is his relationship with his assistant coach, Coach Beard. Ted and Coach Beard have a deep understanding and mutual respect for one another, which allows them to work together in a way that brings out the best in each other.

In one episode, Ted tells Coach Beard, “I need you. I need you to keep me calm, keep me focused, keep me sane.” By acknowledging that he needs his assistant coach, Ted sets an example for his team, showing that leadership is not about being perfect, but rather about building a strong team that supports one another.

Ted’s relationship with Coach Beard also shows that effective leadership is not a solo venture. It requires a team of people who can rely on each other and work together towards a common goal. In the end, Ted’s relationship with Coach Beard makes him a better coach, and it ultimately leads to the team’s success bringing them back to the Premier League.

The character of Ted Lasso teaches us that leadership is not about being the most dominant or feared figure, but rather about being vulnerable, empathetic, and understanding. Ted’s willingness to be vulnerable, his use of colloquialisms to create a shared language, and his strong relationship with Coach Beard are just a few of the strategies that make him an effective leader. By following in Ted’s footsteps, we can all become better leaders, creating workplaces that are more compassionate, empathetic, and successful.

Key Takeaway

Ted Lasso, the titular character of the hit TV show, is a model for effective and transformational leadership. Key takeaways include the importance of vulnerability in leadership, the positive impact of using colloquialisms to create a shared language, and the power of building strong relationships within a team.

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Sensory Pollution: A Silent Killer for Leadership Impact

/ Jonathan Sachs

I’ve been thinking lately about pollution. This time, not pollution in the environmental sense, which is how man-made items contaminate the environment. Instead, I’ve been wrestling lately with another kind of pollution that impacts leadership.

Sensory pollution can distract leaders and shift focus to non-important work. This can hurt their ability to practice leadership effectively.
Sensory pollution can distract leaders and shift focus to non-important work

Leaders face so many distractions, which can pollute or contaminate the mind. Let’s call this “Sensory pollution,” a phenomenon that has been extensively studied in animals, but has a very important impact on leaders as well.

Where does Sensory Pollution come from?

Some culprits of sensory pollution are social media, the 24-hour news cycle, and other value-subtracting stimuli. Sites like Twitter and Facebook are filled with garbage dopamine and cortisol hits. From a sensory perspective, social media contaminates my sense of sight and my sense of touch, reflexively scrolling through my news feed passing by the minutes looking for the next hit.

In fact, my phone is filled with distracting sensory pollution, engaging the sense of touch to select and scroll, the sight of an application opening up and having unread messages, and the sound of someone trying to reach me through the “ding” from the speaker. Just waking up in the morning can be a sensory pollution minefield.

Then there can be the pollution from draining relationships at work. The never ended meetings that do not reach next steps or a logical conclusion can also pollute the mind and cause a leader to focus on trivial tasks, putting out fires, and pure survival.

Finally, there’s pollution through the sense of taste. For example, when I am stressed, I know that I reach for items that contaminate my body including fast food, fried food, and sweets.

My point in sharing the concept of sensory pollution is that all of these things contaminate the mind and make a leader less impactful and effective.

At their core, leaders are responsible for three things:

1) IMPACT – Having an impact on the core measures and outputs for the business

2) LEGACY – Treating other people, including team members, colleagues, and senior leadership, well and with respect.

3) SANITY – Preserving their own sanity by managing the commitment and emotional investments that come with being a leader.

Does sensory pollution actually advance any of these three areas of focus? If, for example, knowing what is going on in the world is a part of your job, how might you minimize the noise of news cycle punditry to reduce sensory pollution?

The answer lies in lessons from the Stoics, among others. Part of preserving a leader’s sanity is to quiet the mind and be able to focus even in the face of distraction. It is one of the most difficult parts of leadership but also one of the most essential.

Ryan Holiday, a modern student of and prolific writer about Stoic philosophy has been a core resource in my leadership practice to learn how to reduce sensory pollution.

In a recent tweet, Holiday shared:

In addition, you can reduce sensory pollution by not checking your phone within one-hour of waking up in the morning, practicing some form of meditation, and developing non-work relationships in your life that do not mind listening to you reflect or vent on hard issues (pro-tip, someone with a long commute is generally excited to spend time with you on the phone).

Sensory pollution is one of the biggest risks for leaders and must be managed to preserve a leader’s impact, legacy and sanity. Work environments, and its values and behaviors, should make an effort to significantly reduce sensory pollution in order to drive its most important outcomes.

Key Takeaways to Improve Leadership

Sensory pollution for leaders are the things that contaminate your mind, make you reactive, and drain your energy. It is not as simple as going cold-turkey on negative stimuli. Leaders must have a routine or mitigation strategies to filter out the contaminants and focus on the three main aspects of being a leader – your impact, your legacy, and your sanity.

Ten rules for being human

/ Jonathan Sachs

The year I graduated from college, I was looking for a good way to stay in shape. I enrolled in martial arts classes at the Black Belt Martial Arts Center. The gym was an almost magical place where the instructors were always positive, but were simultaneously always pushing me out of my comfort zone and encouraging me to test my physical limits. It was not only the best exercise I’ve ever gotten, but it was so good for my mental health as well. I miss martial arts and plan to pick it back up.

Before one of our classes, Master RJ Lee shared, “The Ten Rules for Being Human” by Cherie Carter Scott, which are posted below.

I have these rules and the Holstee Manifesto on my desk at work, reminding me every day of some of these basic life truths, which I have found to be important guidance, especially as an adult.

But one of these rules in particular have been coming up for me repeatedly lately as I observe the world and, more specifically, as I lead a change management effort. Rule #7 has manifested itself several times this year in meetings, phone calls, and the occasional hostile or nasty email. At its basic level, I interpret #7 much like the concept of projection in psychology.

In Psychology Today, projection is described this way: “Unconscious discomfort can lead people to attribute unacceptable feelings or impulses to someone else to avoid confronting them. Projection allows the difficult trait to be addressed without the individual fully recognizing it in themselves.”

Originally described by Sigmund Freud in 1895, Carl Jung and Marie-Louise von Franz built upon Freud’s description of projection as a defense mechanism. Jung and von Franz believed that projection represents a fear of the unknown, which is inherent in change, especially in a work environment that was previously static or predictable.

I’ve been giving extra thought to this concept lately, especially at work. I have been trying to figure out an answer to the question, what does a leader do when people lash out in what is a clear projection?

The best answer I have come up with is first, not to take it personally. In the style of servant leadership, if the leadership can recognize a clear projection, it is obviously much more about the needs of the person speaking to you. In other words, “It’s not about you.”

Next, there is internal work a leader must do to make sure that the projection does not get solidified in their mind as fear. I took a course last year from Stanford University that offered a helpful trick. I learned than when I experience a difficult moment in leadership, like someone lashing out at me, and I internalize it negatively and dwell on it. When I would go to sleep, my brain hard-wires that memory and it can trigger a fight-or-flight response when I confront the same thing again. Instead, if I take a moment and engage in reflection (I use a journal) to reframe the incident before I sleep, my brain will not hard-wire the negativity. I try not to let one instance of discomfort have a profound impact on my behavior in similar situations moving forward.

After that internal work is when I decide on the next step. I think about the impact the particular behavior could have on the broader team culture and usually consider that first. From there, I check in with my definition of leadership. That usually helps me decide the best next step.

When confronted with a clear projection, leaders start with the internal work of self-management and self-reflection. Leaders must then consider the broader impact of their response on both the team and their larger goals.

KEY TAKEAWAY: Leaders work hard on the internal processing of incidents and use tools for reflection like the Ten Rules for Being Human and the Holstee Manifesto to put those difficult moments into perspective.